Saturday, March 24, 2007

No More Photos, I Swear On Elvis's Grave




I am pretty much at the end of this portion of this second life. Seems as if complete strangers to my blog, like jane is dating, along with regulars like Lucas Pederson insist I stop with the photos. OK, so no photos of me with a pig nose, or with the bandages off and metal sutures in my nose (I thought one was a nose hair and battled pulling it out, bad idea). By 1995, I had had 12 operations, both on my arm and my head. The following year I had a kidney stone, but that is not even worthy of a tale, unless you want graphics about a clamp being placed into...well, I can't even continue. Instead, I have posted two simple shots. The first is my little laboratory by the computer, with Steve McQueen threatening to shoot me if I stop writing, The Gentleman (from Buffy) and my favorite pest, the Psycho-Pirate. The second photo shows my handwriting close up. Pretty good with my left hand again, 17 years after the accident. The damn right hand still sucks donkey dick at anything (my big joke is that if I try and masturbate with my right hand I might as well be trying to push my dick through a Play-Doh Fun Factory), and the writing still shows like a damn EKG chart. I had to use my right hand to sign medical documents, bills, even a few books. Why the HELL was I using my middle name even when I was signing an agreement that it was OK to put me under anesthesia? Regardless, it was during this time that I started using gel pens. I'm hurting as I type this, simply from using donkey dick to write three words, the brain impulses are flying all over, maybe the hand will think it can turn into that movie monster Beast With Five Fingers. Peter Graves, right, Sid? Charles? (I think Sternberg was actually in the film, through his latex time portal). I may be writing with no real direction here because I am listening to a CD of Afrikaans music that Etain mailed me and my blood pressure seems to have flattened out by listening to Laurika Rauch and Anton Goosen. It is like music you would hear in the background of a film that involved a journey of some sort. Which kind of brings me back to the stasrt of my second life. Obviously I continued writing, for better or worse, til death do I part. I have been saddened at the passing of writers from the generation before mine, Karl Edward Wagner, Robert Bloch, and Evan Hunter. I'm watching new writers like Lucas Pederson, Barton Fanning, Drizel Burger, and others put their toes in the literary pool. And I remain in the trenches with Sid and Larry and Bob and Roger, moving forward story by story, getting closer to The Big Break. My luck, I'll finally get noticed but will lose in a coin toss to a transgendered dwarf named Vinnie Cthulhu and fall back into the relative obscurity I live in now. Glad I'm not being graded on this essay. Over and out.

7 comments:

Drizel said...

Happy you like the CD, it was my fav too. Time will roll on that is why, we all must do our best at what we feel is right:)
Enjoy your day Mr Man:)

Sidney said...

Well, you can imagine the casual surfer hitting the Next Blog Over button and being greeted with, say, the nose bleed picture.

Sidney said...

P.S. is that like the head of one of The Gentlemen from Buffy to Steve McQueen's left?

Charles Gramlich said...

You still print as well as I do and supposedly both of my hands work fine. I think it's my brain that doesn't work that well, or at least doesn't connect to the hands.

James Robert Smith said...

Where'd you get the Steve McQueen figure? Who makes it?

The big break will come. Seems to happen for the folk who write novels. So...

Wagner was something. Funny how his stuff has completely faded with his death. I rarely encounter folk who have even heard of him, or who know anything about his central creation: Kane. Even the novel KILLER, which he co-authored with David Drake seems to be out of print. I suppose he was one of those authors whose personality drove the sales of his books. With that personality vanished, the books went out of print. He was an amazing talent. And I sorely miss his Year's Best Horror anthology. The so-called year's best folk who followed him totally suck ass (along with the stories among their circle-jerk of author-pals).

Lana Gramlich said...

Actually you print better than Charles does--keep it under your hat. ;) Enjoyed this post immensely & love the pic of Steve McQueen! Write on, brutha!

Lana Gramlich said...
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