Monday, February 25, 2008
I Wish I Had Candy Bars For Elvis, P.I.
I waited too long and by the time I drove past the old Colony Theater towards Rockwell, the place was already gone. Not a meth lab, not the place where they tortured The Black Dahlia. Nope, it was the place that had the lyrics for "Candy Bars For Elvis" by Barry Tiffin on an actual sheet of type-written paper. This guy is sleeping in the back of his pick up truck, curiously directly behind the back door to the RCA recording studio, when a man came out and gave hom twenty bucks to buy some candy bars for the King. Well, it turned the guy's life around, he got a job someplace, maybe he got married, I forget the idiotic and whiny details. But it gets better. See, this guy was recollecting the nadir of his life--much like I did recently, only this guy owned a truck and was in warmer weather--and in the present(1991, when the record was released), he laments that if could only see Elvis alive again he'd give him some...candy...sniffle...bars. To show you how little there is on this song, I put Jonny Algiers on the job, he went to ElvisPedia and found this:
Candy Bars For Elvis
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Candy Bars For Elvis is a bootleg on the Mongoose label, released in 1991.
So I wasn't making that part up. Oh, and the best line of that Private Eye song was that "he met more chickies than a Girl Scout leader," and that's downright creepy, if you think about it...Wayne