Sunday, September 2, 2007

My Bram Stoker Touch & The Cult of Sternberg

On Stewart "Cult of" Sternberg's blog, he requested--well, he tried to cyber-hypnotize--me to check out the website of this guy Scribbler580. Well, there's a good chance that if I go to this guy's site, from what Stewart says, he's a new writer, well, eventually this guy will win a Bram Stoker Award. As you can see from the above images, I've been a Finalist in five DIFFERENT categories, and, yes, Kate, I did call myself the Susan Lucci of the Stokers back in the day both of us were losers. I even lost to Stephen King by two digit votes. I alluded to my poetry yesterday, Annihilation Press will be publishing a collection, MEMOS FROM AN ELEVATED HELL, in the spring of 08. I'm not certain if the Horror Writers Association has a way for me to lose for poetry collection, it would likely be in "other media." Perhaps they'll include blogs in their awards, and I'll be a Finalist to Stewart. See, I have the touch. Way back in the day, the first person to want an autograph of THE HOLY TERROR was Bill Sheehan. I had not seen the book yet, having been on a panel when the dealer's room in Nashville opened. Bill had never written a thing, he simply enjoyed the cons and meeting the writers and artists. After awhile, he started writing. Then he wrote a biography of Peter Straub, AT THE FOOT OF THE STORY TREE. Then he won a Bram Stoker Award. Sternberg stares you down from his blog profile like a satanic James Lipton crossed with Malcolm McDowell. Go to his site. Find the link to Scribbler580. I'm afraid to use his name because there one day might be a Stoker award for People Whose Blog Wayne Allen Sallee Has Mentioned. As it is, amongst Bob and Sid and Etain and Charles, Stewart seems the likely one to kick my ass should that award ever materialize. Wait and see...Wayne


Charles Gramlich said...

Perhap one day you'll win a "Sternberg." Then who'll care about the Stokers.

James Robert Smith said...

There is one thing to keep in mind about incestuous little awards, and the especially incestuous HWA Stoker Award. And it is that they are vacuous popularity contests won out by the oaf who can coax the most of his pals into voting for his effort. That you lost is not a testament to the inferiority of your work, but rather to the fact that you did not campaign for the award.

One of my friends calls them the "Stroker Awards". And he won one!

As you probably know, I have nothing but contempt for such popularity contests, for invariably the worst of the lot often "wins". And do you really want to take part in a circle jerk?


Wayne Allen Sallee said...

A Sternberg, hmnn. What would it look like? The Stokers are haunted houses with doors that always break off when you open them to read "your plaque." I recall Dennis Etchison handing me my two certificates in '92, saying "Ah, hang 'em on the wall or something." I don't even have the originals anymore, just scans. They didn't follow me to Burbank. And Bob, yes, there are enough jerks in the circle anyways. Also, I'm writing crime fiction now. Time to not win an Edgar. But...what would a Sternberg look like?

Jon said...

Although it would be tempting to imagine "The Sternberg Award" to have a Cthulu-like critter oozing up from a craig, it would more likely be in the form of a small sheaf of paper, a ball-point pen half burried in it with congealed blood around the gash. The pen would have just finished writing the word, "Garbage!"
I see this happen every alternate Thursday and those who are treated to it either take it as a great compliment or run away crying. Mostly the latter.

RK Sterling said...

What would a Sternberg look like... time to get Sidney on the case, I think. :)

Hey Wayne - a close win/lose with King isn't too shabby.

Drizel said...

Id like that award, would be an did convince me that I am to did give me inspiration.....will always be thankfull for your awards by the way.
Mis you, maaikie:)