Friday, March 2, 2007

my nemesis has returned

after my boss was ready to call homeland security because he took a call from the best buy geek squad idiot who referred to himself as agent gerardo--c'mon, shorten my name to wayn al-sallee, not much of a stretch--everything was straightened out and we had a good laugh like at the end of the barney miller show when the frame froze with everyone slapping their knee in laughter. well, aol is up and running, though i am typing this from work because of the lower case, and i swear its because the area is so so so cramped that i cannot even put my right hand anywhere near the keyboard, yes i know i could cap lock type cap unlock, but that would be too much like dancing with the stars with bill gates in a windows-colored thong as my partner, no thank you and put me on that island steve mcqueen tried to escape from. i swear to christ that that geek squad fuckburger almost got me in for a nice q and a session with jr. and sr. both. but later tonight i shall make my way past the still falling snow, wondering when western society will cave in on itself, think about young kids headbanging in johannesburg and fellow writers' workplaces being shot up in texas, the giant dome of sternberg hovering over the entire northern hemisphere like a big chewy gumdrop full of doom, and get caught up on my emails. so watch out, kate and charles and etain and sid and bob and von and, yes, even you, stewart. peace out, i'm back. wayne

6 comments:

lee said...

Bill Gates in a windows-coloured thong -that could make for interesting viewing. Actually how DO people wear those things? - I couldn't think of anything worse than having (what amounts to) a piece of string wedged in your crack.

signed:old-fashioned undies wearer.

etain_lavena said...

well Lee, if one gets use to it, itis not half that bad....But I also changed my undeware to more...gosh, I r on Wayne's blog, why for disguss undies....good mother of mary....ok....heandbanging is fun but dont try it at home, or while operating heavy machinery.....
HUGZ:)

Charles Gramlich said...

I too enjoyed the phrasing of "windows colored thong," but now I have an image in my head that I'd prefer not ot have. Oh well, guess that's why they make whiskey and heavy metal. Glad the multiverse couldn't keep you exiled.

Stewart Sternberg said...

you know, I'm afraid to even say HOMELAND SECURITY. I whisper it at night when everyone is sleeping, and then blame it on someone else.

As for ayne al-salee, well, I'll leave that to the Bushies to sort out. I'd try to work on my name but Stern-berg....well, it just doesn't work as well.

HemlockMan said...

Since I hate W. Moron's guts so bad, and never miss an opportunity to say so, I often wonder if I'm on the "no fly" list. I've wondered if there's any way to find out before you actually get to the airport, or if just asking gets you in trouble.

I always wondered why McQueen wanted off that island so much he was willing to jump off a cliff on a raft of coconuts and swim out to sea. It seemed like a pretty neat place.

Wayne Allen Sallee said...

Bob, I'm glad you caught my Mcqueen reference. Lee and Etain, sharing underwear stories, Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. Stewart, you kill me as usual and Charles, who said I'm the right guy from before the multiverse split? Yrs, enyaW